Rough Week

This week has been really rough on me emotionally. A lot of little things happened at once and totally added up causing a multiplier effect. It's during these times though when friends really show themselves. There was one friend I thought I had that I asked to keep me company while I ran a couple of errands and then afterwards at his place. I just really needed somebody with me. I don't cry when someone else is there. This person was close to where I was and completely available-he's unemployed and did not have school on this day. He refused to join me saying he was content at home and I could come over. Well, I had things to do first and the fact that he couldn't stop thinking about himself and what he wanted when someone else was hurting was just repulsive to me. I stopped by his place, but only to pick up some of my things I had left there so I wouldn't have to go back later and get it. I now consider him completely out of my life. He's been in and out for years-literally. The times we've had together were priceless but I need to think of myself. I can't be in friendships where I give and give of myself and when I really need to receive, there's nothing to receive. If someone doesn't want to be a friend when I really need one, I don't want him when I don't need a friend. This may sound selfish of me but my heart and feelings need to be firs sometimes. When I'm bawling my eyes out on your front porch, just give me a hug. Don't try to tell me I have no reason to be mad or upset, especially when you have no idea.